Fear America

I realize I talk a lot about nothing

I don’t act as much as I should

I make a lot of excuses for myself.

And still you look up to me.

But I’m not who they pipe me up to be.

And it isn’t fair that you take me as a role model

When times get hard, I roll that’s my motto.

Never standing up for what I believe

Just taking advantage of your hope.

Like a drug dealer serving dope.

I give you just enough to keep you hooked.

And I know what I’m doing is wrong but I’m into deep.

See if I backed out now they would call me a coward

See I’m really not in power I’m just a face of a dream that we all been visioning for to long

And we all know that when you dream something for so long over and over again

You begin to find it hard to distinguish reality from fantasy.

Or imagination, see how can one person rule this turmoil nation.

How can I make a change when selling all types of wars and discord make me so much change?

If you thought I wasn’t affected by the root to all evil.

You were naive to juvenile and immature to believe,

That this was all a set up .

And I know the truth hurts I find it hard to accept myself

More power more wealth, I’m beginning to loose myself.

And I know in the mist of all my lies

Lies a pile of broken hearts, tanks un fueled, ammunition on low

To ready and willing to fight for what you don’t know.

Well know that I am only human and I make mistakes.

I’m just sorry if my mistakes left you all at stake

I wasn’t ready for this relationship

I’m not fit for the position or mission but in all honesty I don’t know anyone who is.

So don’t blame me because that’s what they want you to do

Just know that I was made up to be something I couldn’t possibly be

The shoes needed filling and I was to ready and willing 

But I couldn’t fit them no matter how much I stuffed them with hope, the job was to complex.

Read between the lines the government has and always will be corrupt.

It doesn’t matter if the head of state is black, white, democrat or republican

Politics don’t judge than. And I’m sorry for so much I don’t know where to begin.

But I don’t see an ending to this horrid nightmare that leaves me stuck in between

A rock and a hard place, I find it hard to face.

The faces of millions who believed me 

I didn’t intentionally deceive any of you

I just don’t know how to make your dream come true.

And don’t think it’s not something I don’t want to do.

Just know I’m not the bad guy

And I can give you a million reasons why

But I would be lying if I said I tried my best.

And even if I did it would be too late for the souls already put to rest.

I’m so stressed because of my foolishness

So I stand before you with my deepest sincerest apology

Because at the least you deserve that.

And I don’t know if it matters but I am waiting as you, for that change to come

-Dayona Aisha Evans